Friday, August 20, 2010

Why would a girl break up after 3 hours of dating, after a month and a half of all the signs she's ready?

Exactly 1 and a half months ago I asked a girl to homecoming, I am in the ninth grade and we had dated before every year since the 6th grade. Every time that it didn't work out between us dating it was because she had ';stresses'; surrounding her family, school, and sports and said that she simply couldn't handle another stress or pressure of a boyfriend. However when I asked her to this homecoming it began all about just going as old friends. But things began to look up other than the ways they had before. We had begun to talk about life and similarities we had like never before. It seemed as though we had the very same mindset and outlooks upon life itself, but I decided to wait to ask her to be my girl at homecoming and she certainly was aware of my implications. She had even been the one to begin saying ';I Love You'; every night before we went to bed. We talked what seemed like forever and about every possible topic that could be talked. And living in North Alabama, which is the closest I will reveal my location, she lived extremely close to a tornado that touched down a mere week ago, (the dance this past Saturday Jan. 25) and worried about her, I asked if everything was okay. I didn't receive a message from her until later that evening explaining how all the cable, Internet, (she had been texting from her iPod to my phone because her dad is quite strict) and phones had gone out and she tried for hours to get a hold of me. After letting her know that I had promised myself I wouldn't sleep until I heard some news of what happened she said, ';Wow! You really mean a ton to me. I'm so glad to have you here with me.'; In those exact words. It had really hit me that we may actually be able to develop a real relationship this time. So finally the night of the homecoming dance came. We ate out with 5 other couples and had a blast at dinner. We went to the dance and we stuck together dancing for 3 hours. The entire time she would grab my hands and I would grab hers, she would dance with the liveliest smile I had ever seen her smile. The only bad thing that happened was when a friend of mine's date had begun to feel a stomachache and she would leave for up to 15 minutes to comfort her. But she would always come back to be with me. And when dancing to a particularly romantic song I softly said in her ear, ';I want to make it official, how would you like for me to be your guy, and you can be my girl.'; She responded saying ';Of course!'; I said, ';That's perfectly fine with me.'; She laughed. We danced holding onto each other for the next half hour until her friend began feeling even worse. Once she returned she informed me to keep the new relationship quiet for now because ';she didn't want her parents to know.'; At the time I found this perfectly understandable, I knew she had daddy issues, but I also had met him many times and truly always trusted me around her and let me know how good a guy I was. After the dance we went to a breakfast at a classmates house. After all the excitement we went to be with our separate friends (also the fact that her mother was a chaperon there and she didn't want her mother to become aware). But in the last half-hour before I would leave I began to feel symptoms of feeling exhaustion sickness from the little amount of sleep I had been getting. She definitely showed signs of her concern and asked if I needed some water and that I should be sleeping more. Eventually my ride got to the house and we said goodnight to each other and she whispered in my ear, ';I had a lot of fun, Night Love you.'; And even before I went to the street I said bye to her mother and she thanked me for taking her daughter and that she knew she had a blast and that it meant a lot to her and her husband. Not 5 minutes after I left the house she sends a text message asking how I am feeling. I said pretty much the same but I'll probably feel better in the morning. Then she said that that's good. So I asked how she was doing, as a normal conversation typically goes. She said fine and that she had to ask me a question. This question was exactly, ';Do we have to start dating now, I just have so many stresses and I just don't think I can handle having a boyfriend now.'; 100% stunned I replied, ';Ugh, I was afraid that this would happen, but I mean if it's really what you want.'; (The next quotes on and off are the remaining conversation.) ';I'm sorry, I just can't do it now.'; ';Well, I always am here for you and I want to be that guy you escape to in order to not feel these stresses.'; ';I know but I just can't do it now.'; ';Okay than, can you help me to better understand what exactly is stressing you?'; ';It's all about school, family, friends and sports.'; (I believed this at the time, but now I believe it may have been a cover up for some bigger issue she may have been having). Everyone this is extremely important to me and I only wrote this much in order to fully explain the importance of this situation to me because I simply do not underWhy would a girl break up after 3 hours of dating, after a month and a half of all the signs she's ready?
You wrote too much and it was too boring. Sorry





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